Wander Infinity: January 2013

Reconnecting with my family here in Japan has been a profound and challenging experience in the utmost dualistic nature, but I feel like I've jumped the hurdle. Like any integrated member of a society, majority of my relatives are quite integrated into "the system". The same system I have strived to separate myself from. What a laugh huh?
I do however, feel it has been an empowering experience of growth. I have integrated on a deeper level what t is to be open and unattached. To love, accept, and experience Their lives with out judgement.

And so in rolling with that flow, I'm going to do something that scares me out of my wits! Navigate the extensive Japanese train network on my own! I know it doesn't seem like such a frightening thing, until you actually see......

This is just for Central Tokyo!

I strongly believe in doing things that totally petrify us, if not once a month, than at least once in awhile. I feel it makes us stronger, more adaptable people :)

So wish me luck!

The past two years, I have found myself building a nest of feathers, soft down, twigs, and sparkling shells on a mystical island off the British Columbian coast line.

Like the Sun's rays dissipate into the dark of night, my once busy schedule chained to "the clock" rapidly faded into the abyss. I came to learn time by the phase of the Moon, planting on the new, and harvesting on the full. Living my day to day by the weather, tides and seasons. For the first time in the jumble of my scattered and chaotic life events, I felt at Home. Completely and utterly in place, like a key having met its perfect matching lock. I made friends, and community, even considering many my own Family. My heart soared with eagles, my spirit ran with the wolves, my body and mind afresh with every changing tide. I unearthed a deep, established root system in myself, becoming one with the emerald, dew mantled old growth forests.

As our world continues to turn and change, so our lives, much like the seasons must also reshape themselves. My exploration for inner growth and healing brought me back onto one of those big ol' shiny metal time/space travel machines across the Pacific into tomorrow; The land of the Rising Sun, my homeland and birthplace.

I write this sitting in the house where I crossed the threshold into this complexly magical world. My Obachan's (Grandmother's) home sits in a suburb on Tokyo Bay. Quiet enough for a reborn country girl like myself, but still bustling like any city in Japan. Like many before me I'm sure, I have struggled with my past. Feeling emotions of abandonment and disconnection with my roots. Never having had my Father around to pass along the cultural traditions and stories of our land, I had many a moment felt a grand loss in my identity. However, I chose before my departure, to come here with no attachments, nor any expectations. To come and experience for myself what this magic This land holds as treasure. And oh what a profound challenge it has been.

I stepped into a world of sensory overwhelming advertisement, consumerism and junk food.

Where would I find my grounded sense of positivity in such a deeply unconscious society? Every other instant I found myself on the verge of tears.

How could they change if they were so far down the hole?

How would they ever know the world that I have so come to love? The only question I can answer is the first.

In myself.

I began to integrate this epiphany. How many times will it take? lol ;-)

Realizing that maybe my purpose is to be a bridge, and a light. To share and inspire the art of turning Dreams into Realities.

I could go on about the details of my trip, but I feel like that bit of typing is enough for me tonight. So I'll share some photos instead. Thank you for reading a little bit of my Heart's thoughts.